Have You Been out Christmas Shopping Lately?

Christmas Shopping Madness!

Christmas shopping                ?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????                batman-robin-24223694

 Have you been out Christmas shopping yet?  Holy Christmas rage Batman!!!

Last Friday was the annual “Save 20% Night” at the Avalon Mall or ”Midnight Madness” as it is affectionately known.  It’s the St. John’s version of “Black Friday” where the fervor of the Christmas shopping rush is stoked by the ingestion of large doses of turkey, compliments of the US Thanksgiving   The week leading up to the event, all you hear on the radio are advertisements for gigantic blowout specials, Bogo deals, and free gift with purchase offers at participating stores.  The kids are whipped into a frenzy with promises of a talking Christmas tree, dancing reindeer*, visits with Santa and a special appearance by Captain America!  It is an event not to be missed!

At quitting time, people in offices all over town are lined up like marathon runners, sneakers on, water bottles in hand, credit cards at the ready,  waiting for the clock to strike five.  All routes leading into the Shopping District resemble Nascar tracks, as rabid drivers jostle for position, trying to gain entrance to the Mall parking lot, horns blaring and rude hand gestures abounding.  Once you finally make it onto the parking lot, the next half hour is spent “hovering”, waiting for a parking spot to open up.  It is a generally accepted rule of courtesy that if one is parked with their indicator flashing when a shopper returns to their car to vacate their parking spot, the waiting driver gets to take it.  However, there is the occasional arrogant asshole who will pull  in ahead of the waiting driver and claim the spot.  This leads to tempers flaring, curses being shouted and threats of nasty retaliation being made.  Some people, of course, will inevitably step outside the bounds of authority and park their cars in no parking zones and places where one would never even think to put a car.

Once you finally gain access to the five hundred thousand square feet of shopping mania, the fun really begins.  The mall is decked out in the season’s finest trimmings.  The ‘muzak’ is blaring and a stroller queue of overtired, overstimulated tots are kicking up didoes in the center court, bawling their eyes out as their mothers plant them on Santa’s lap for pictures.  Terrifying! You finally make it down to the electronics store only to find out the fifty inch smart TVs they were selling for three hundred bucks sold out an hour after opening this morning.  You almost buy the seventy inch with the 3D images of shark week playing, until you realize that you’d have to sell your car, all of your clothes, and possibly your firstborn  to be able to afford it. Your head gets muddled and you try and remember who’s on your Christmas list and who you’ve got left to buy something for, but everything is so distracting, and isn’t that little dress perfect for the company Christmas party!  An hour later, you’ve burned through all your cash and half the remaining credit limit on your cards.  Only five more gifts to buy!  At this point your feet are aching, your head is pounding and you’re dry as the Sahara desert and the line up at Tim Hortons is still a mile long.   Suddenly someone yells, “There’s a fresh delivery of Disney “ Frozen” dolls at Walmart!!” and you plaster yourself against a wall to avoid being stampeded by the hoard of frenzied parents swarming the exit.

Now that you are freshly caffeinated, with a bellyful of Timbits to boot, you get your second wind and attack the rest of the stores with a vengeance.  Jostling bags, boxes, and rolls of Christmas wrap, you squeeze through the Mall exit door at 11:45 pm, your feet ready to fall off, and you realize that you’re parked over in the west parking lot, which means a half hour long hike around the Mall.

And that, my friends, is only the start of the Christmas Madness.  I swear to God, this year I will be ordering my Christmas groceries at the mom and pop store that delivers, and the cookies and Christmas cake will likely be purchased at a bakery.  To hell with Christmas traditions, next year I’m going on a cruise!

 

fun-ship-sailing-away-16366685

 

*Dancing Reindeer, I kid you not!

 

 

 

 

Comments

  1. Today, while I was at work, my sister stole my iphone and tested
    to see if it can survive a twenty five foot drop, just so
    she can be a youtube sensation. My apple ipad is now destroyed and she has 83 views.

    I know this is entirely off topic but I had to share it with someone!

  2. I just want to tell you that I’m new to weblog and seriously savored you’re blog. Likely I’m going to bookmark your blog post . You actually have terrific article content. Thanks for revealing your web site.

  3. hey there and thank you for your info – I’ve certainly picked up anything new from right here.
    I did however expertise several technical points using
    this site, since I experienced to reload the site a lot of times previous to I could get it to load properly.
    I had been wondering if your web hosting is OK? Not that I am complaining, but slow loading instances times will very frequently affect your placement in google and could damage
    your high quality score if advertising and marketing with Adwords.
    Well I am adding this RSS to my e-mail and could look out for much more of your respective fascinating content.
    Make sure you update this again very soon.

  4. Wow, marvelous weblog layout! How lengthy have you been running a blog for?
    you make blogging glance easy. The total look of your web site is
    wonderful, as neatly as the content material!

    • Thank you! The blog’s been up since November. WordPress makes it easy.

    • Thank you. your comments are much appreciated. Blogging is easy with WordPress. They have lots of templates in studiopress to make setting up your website fast and easy. My blog ha only been up since November

  5. Yes, WordPress makes creating a website easy and there’s lots of add ons you can buy as your needs grow. You don’t need any experience with HTML to set it up and there’s lots of tech support if you need assistance. It’s a really quick way to get up and running

  6. Attractive component of content. I simply stumbled upon your website and in accession capital to say that
    I acquire in fact loved account your weblog posts. Any way
    I’ll be subscribing for your feeds or even I
    success you get entry to persistently rapidly.

  7. It’s an awesome article desigfned for all the web users; they will obtain advantage from it I am sure.

  8. Can I simply just say what a comfortt to discover an individual who truly
    knows what thy are discussing online. You definitely realize
    how to bring an issue to light and make it important.
    More people have to look at this and understand this side of tthe story.
    I was surprised you are not more popular since you definitely have the gift.

  9. Hi! I’ve been reading you site for a while now and finally got
    the courage to go ahead and give yyou a shout out from Houston Texas!

    Just wanted to say keep upp the excellent
    work!

    • Hi Houston! Thanks so much for the feedback! Sometimes it feels like you’re shouting into the abyss when you’re posting online. Thanks for reading.

  10. I have leawrn some good stuff here. Definitely priuce bookmarking for revisiting.
    I wonder how much attempt you put to create such a wonderful informative site.

    • Hi, thanks for your comment! I’m so glad you are getting good information from the site. I really think it’s important to have an understanding about what’s going on around the world, and it helps me be able to sort things out in my own head by writing it down. There’s a good bit of reading involved in getting accurate information, but it’s great to actually be able to access speeches and video of politicians world leaders so that you can get the information right from the “horse’s mouth” without things getting taken out of context. Thanks for visiting, please come back again!

  11. Thanjks for some other great article. The place elsse may anybody get that type
    oof information in such an ideal way of writing? I have a presentation next week, and I am at thee search for
    such info.

    • Thanks for your great comments! Google is my best friend for searching. You have to really think about your key words, and direct the search engine to filter out as much general information as you can. For instance, if you want information on euthanasia, and you are interested in assisted suicide for people with terminal illness, just searching on the keyword euthanasia will bring up everything from euthanasia in animals to people, and everything in between. Instead, type in euthanasia-people-terminal-illness-degenerative-severe-pain, you will get a narrower, more focused selection of information. Hope this helps! Good luck with your project.

  12. Fantastic web site. Lots of useful info here.
    I am sending it to several pals ans additionally sharing in delicious.
    And certainly, thanks in your effort!

  13. I got this web site from my buddy who informed me regarding this web page and at
    tthe moment this tie I am browsing this site and reading very informative
    articles or reviews here.

  14. Hello! I could have sworn I’ve been to this blog before but after checking through some of the
    post I realized it’s new to me. Anyways, I’m definitely happy I found it and I’ll be bookmarking
    and checking back frequently!

  15. This site certainly has all thee information I wanted concerning this subject
    and didn’t know who to ask.

  16. I’m impressed, I have to admit. Selom do I encounter a blog that’s equally educative and
    amusing, and let me telkl you, you have hit the nail on thee
    head. The problem is something which too feew folks are speaking intelligently about.
    I’m very happy I found thiss during my search for something concerning
    this.

  17. Superb, what a webpage it is! This webpage presents valuable data to us, keep it up.

  18. I always spent my half an hour to read this
    website’s artocles or reviews dail along with a cup of coffee.

  19. It is in reality a nice and helpful piece of information. I am satisfied that you simply shared this useful info
    with us. Please stay us informed like this. Thank you for sharing.

Leave a Reply to admin Cancel reply

*

Social Media Icons Powered by Acurax Web Design Company
Visit Us On TwitterVisit Us On FacebookVisit Us On Pinterest